Roman Dog

The life of a Roman dog, as told by Roman, the dog.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Wolves and Foxes, Beware

To me, the spirit of the wolf, the fox and the coyote inhabit what many humans think is a simple play-toy.

This knotted rope, in fact, represents to me all that is evil; all who seek to destroy my sheep, (who don't exist except in my mind.)

But it doesn't hurt to practice. When the time comes, thieving scalawags and ne'er-do-wells will all know of Roman of the Hills; Wolf Slayer, Fox Destroyer and Coyote Crusher. Bring it on, chumps.

Later,

- Roman

Friday, August 26, 2005

Keeping the Parts Cooled












Ahhhh. This is what I was telling you about. Cool tile on my warm personal parts is quite refreshing. I know it looks odd, but it's one of those things that dogs do because they can - and you would too if you could.

Later,

- Roman

Thursday, August 25, 2005

A Job Well Done

When I am done chasing the Frisbee, I bring it under the trampoline, which is the closest thing we have to a sheep pen here. I know what I'm doing and someday I will be baddest sheep herder in the Hills. My master thinks I am just playing. Actually, this is all very calculated and premeditated. I am not going to be made a fool of when they release me someday to round up sheep. Sheep are Frisbees, as far as I'm concerned, and Frisbees are Sheep.

Later,

- Roman

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Yes, I shed. Sorry.















August is a real hot time, so I try to cool off on the tile as much as possible. Later, I'll show you a picture of me cooling my male parts on the tile. People think it's gross, but until you've tried it, you can't talk.

See that glob of hair in front of my front paws? That's mine. The masters hate it, and my answer to them is, "Give me some sheep and a few acres and that stuff wouldn't even be here! I'd shed it off as I ran around doing my job!"

Later,

- Roman

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Tuesday Tedium


People think I'm depressed. And I ask, "Who wouldn't be?" I'm supposed to be herding sheep and frolicking through the hills, but instead I'm here, on a couch. This life is killing me.

Later,

- Roman

Monday, August 22, 2005

Frisbee is Freakin' Fun


















I live to catch me some Friz. Here's me doing just that. I am pretty outstanding at this sport, I must say.

Later,

-Roman

Where are the Kids?

I must have my hours mixed up, 'cause I was pretty sure the kids were due home from school any minute. Pictured here with me is Max, an old poodle who lives with me. He's not much for horsing around and gives me crap all the time for biting his legs. He can't catch a Frisbee either and is terrified of narrow passages.

Hey - What's up?

Hi,

I'm Roman - a dog.

Seems like everyone has a blog these days, so I thought I'd have one too.

This is my life. It's pretty carefree and lazy. Right now I'm really tired.

More later.

-Roman

Daytime TV is Boring

The kids are all in school on a Monday and the masters are working on their stupid computers, so there's nothing to do. I'm so bored. Even though we have digital cable with the Cinemax package, I can't find a thing to watch on the tube. I'm usually not this lazy. Ah well - yes I am. Who am I kidding? I'm a dog.

Later,

- Roman

Black and White

I made a radical decision. Even though I use a digital camera, I'm going to take all of my photos into Photoshop and desaturate them, giving my blog an "old-world" look. I dig the old world, ya know? Life was simpler then. Of course they didn't have air conditioning and cool stuff like that.

But back then, people always fed their dogs table scraps, which was very cool. I get the same old crap everyday; dried Pedigree for dogs with digestive problems. It sucks. I want gravy and meat loaf and garlic bread and good stuff, but my master thinks that's bad for me. When he isn't looking, the kids feed me whatever they're eating. So I get to taste pizza and frosted mini-wheats and mac and cheese. Bagels and spaghetti and burgers and fries. Man, I'm hungry. And tired.

Later,

- Roman